Social Privilege

Not all of us are born to the same circumstances. There will always be differences in social status, which is determined by factors such as income, education level, occupation, race, gender, caste, lineage or even the social groups one's family belongs to.

Some think that it is also in the best interests of those who are privileged to keep it among themselves, lest they lose it for all who are in their "bracket". For example, males in patriarchal societies benefit personally from favouring the continued oppression of women.

Privilege comes in many forms as illustrated by this great image (Image Source: http://www.emanu.se/)

Privilege differentiates most people in what they eventually become. It can even affect one's levels of confidence and self belief. There are a few exceptions where an under-privileged person may break out of that social bracket due to sheer luck or massive determination and reach greater heights. However, for most, social construct remains a limiting factor in being successful.

Perhaps differences like these make the world revolve and the underlying driver is related to an evolutionary mechanism. Perhaps it is a survival mechanism that have evolved in all living beings to maintain a superior set of genes in the gene pool, such as in the case of some have more dominant genes than give them a genetic advantage? The very concept of "privilege" exists because of the existence of two extremes. Like electricity requires two differing potentials to flow, maybe society needs differences to make efficient use of limited resources and opportunities?  If these extremes became less equal, the concept of privilege might vanish, for everyone involved. For example, if everyone escaped poverty, perhaps there won't be enough people to do less desirable jobs like farming or trash collecting. 

My job has also given me an interesting vantage point to observe how the concept of privilege works and it is probably this which led me to this post. I would think that I come from a middle-class family (not entirely unfortunate, but had some struggles moving out of a lower social strata). My work in the capital city of Colombo has led me to associate with people who are mostly of a higher class society (established in this social class for several generations). My work in various projects involving community livelihood development has also led me to see people in lower social classes having greater struggles than the people of middle or higher social classes.

Taking myself as an example, and comparing myself to others, I am privileged in some aspects and under-privileged in others. On one hand, I've been fortunate to have a good education but on the other hand, I may fare worse than someone else with the same level of education but with a family network of established professionals in the same industry. It helps to have mentors who's walked the path and social networks that will help with opportunities. If I had no mentors or networks, though qualified and even capable, I may not have access to good opportunities.

Some have to try harder to reach the same goal (Image source: https://www.oddman.ca)

Just the other day, I was having a chat with Drummer Boy's mother and the lady who helps us with housekeeping. Drummer Boy has an elder brother who's worked his way up to a good job through his sheer determination despite losing his father at a very young age. This has made it possible for him to support his family well, including his little brother's ambitions to become a fully fledged Kandyan Dancer (it is an honorable title, awarded to those who have completed many years of traditional dance under a respected teacher, and it is an expensive affair). Kumudu, our housekeeper, also has a grandson who's shown promising talent in traditional dance and he's even won 2nd place in a national-level competition once. However, this boy's father is a drug addict, alcoholic and the little boy is a constant witness to family fights and his mother and grandmother being beaten by their husbands. A few weeks ago, while coming home drunk at night in his three-wheeler, his father had driven off a ledge, onto the roof of a house. Though the man was unharmed (by a miracle), he has set himself backwards financially and without a means of earning his daily wage for awhile. So this little boy's ambitions, which are similar to Drummer Boy's, may sadly never materialise.

To believe or Not to believe

"What you believe is not the problem. 

What you believe I should believe is the problem."

The other day after the end of a grueling exam for auditors, Shu happily jumped in a bus to get to the interchange to catch another bus heading to Malaysia. In Asia, under normal circumstances, hardly anyone makes conversations with another stranger. It's not that they mean ill, but people on this side of the continent tend to be cautious and being cautious. Of course it's a gross generalisation. If anyone else makes the first attempt at socialising, a lot of these folks will be more happy to open up and become chatty.

As I sat in the bus, I spoke to my both my parents over the phone and whined about how hard the exam was (both in English and Sinhalese). After I hung up, the girl next to me initiated a conversation which went something like this:

Girl: Are you from the Philippines?
Shu: [a bit surprised given that Shu looks nothing like the fair people of Philippines] Um no. I'm from Sri Lanka.
Girl: You speak good English and that other language you spoke sounds like Tagalog. What is that language?
Shu: [beginning to get a bit suspicious] It's called Sinhalese. Are you from Singapore?
Girl: No, I'm from Malaysia.

In the minutes that passed, more information was shared. Then the conversation took a different turn.

Girl: Have you read this religious text before?
Shu: Um... bit and pieces.
Girl: Do you find the English in it hard to understand?
Shu: No.

As with credit card promoters and other persistent salesmen, at this point I would get a bit uncomfortable and try to move away from the situation or worse, get angry if they persist. But on this day, after many days of studying and learning that auditors must always be open minded diplomatic, perceptive, etc, I didn't have the urge to react (it is quite possible I was too drained from the exam). We chatted a bit on what we did and where we lived (unknown to her, I made every effort to steer the conversation from religion to more general topics) and she ended up being helpful in telling me how to get to the bus interchange which was a new area for me!

I've learnt that where I can't change them to think like me, I simply have to change the way I accept their advances:

1. People have various causes, beliefs and opinions, often different to mine. It doesn't matter if these views (in my standards) are good or bad or inbetween - people identify strongly with what drives them internally/ spiritually/ emotionally. Take me and being vegetarian, for example.

2. They may even attempt to convince me to adopt the same views while thinking they are doing the right thing or what's good for me. I think it's okay for people to approach someone to find out if they are interested - how else will there be sales or perpetuation of beliefs and causes? E.g. Have you heard of the benefits of being vegetarian? What's not okay is to keep persisting when the other person is clearly not interested in buying. E.g. You know, you are probably going to die of a horrible illness if you don't seriously consider turning vegetarian.

3. There's no point getting angry and emotional when someone expresses an opinion different to mine. Let them say what they want to say and whether I accept what they say ultimately lies in my control. Also, it lies in my advantage to be calm and emotionally unaffected. Sure, some of them make it their life's mission to change you and need to be dealt with differently E.g. Why won't you have meat? Here, just try this little piece I put on your plate. C'mon, you'll like it. But many others are sensible enough to realise when to stop pursuing it. And you'll probably meet a few who are respectful of your beliefs and never try to challenge it with theirs.

Then it was time to part our ways.

Girl: Do you have a pen so I can write down my email address for you to write to me if you have any questions about my religion?
Shu: Sorry, No.

Cricket: An Obsession

Far away from home, a lot of us who have migrated to other corners of the globe still feel roughly the same about cricket as we did when we were children. The word "cricket" to me can instantly trigger warm and happy memories of sitting long hours in front of the television with family and friends watching 50-over matches, snacking on fried peanuts or murukku, occasionally having turn the antenna manually to catch better TV signals, staying up nights, religiously watching and critiquing the outcomes of nearly every ball, feeling despair when things don't look too good, leaping with joy when sixes are hit or wickets are taken, sometimes biting away nails in nervousness, ears saturated with the loud music of papare bands or feeling the urge to play a game of cricket in the backyard.

This year, I followed the finals with my primary/secondary school mates on Whatsapp (an instant messaging service on phones). It's almost like sitting in my old and familiar classroom - only we are nearly in our 30's now! It didn't matter we were watching and discussing a match happening Bangladesh from all the way in Sri Lanka, Singapore, USA, UK, Norway, Switzerland or UAE at the same time, we were eagerly hoping for a win.

Luckily for us, Sri Lanka emerged the T20 World Cup Cricket champions of 2014!

The best men that day!

Image source: ESPNCricinfo

Wait, did I mention Sri Lanka is a cricket-obsessed nation?

It was a very memorable and exhilarating day since it took 18 years to win a glorious title such as this for a second time. And during those 18 long years, Sri Lanka not only lost four Cricket World Cup finals, but the country itself overcame a civil war that spanned over two decades causing insufferable damage to human lives, trust, respect, property and more. In a way, the country is still struggling to heal from the aftermath of that war. Which is why this victory was a pleasant diversion from racial tensions.

The last time I had this feeling was in 1996 when I was 11 years old and Sri Lanka won the Cricket World Cup for the first time. Sadly, this game is probably the only thing that unites the people of different ages, religions, races, genders, occupations and social status on this island under one flag. It's only during a tense cricket match will all these people forget their differences and sit together in front of a television with great concentration to support the same cause without distinction. At other times, there still is much distrust, dissatisfaction, fear and hate bubbling just beneath the surface.

Kumar Sangakkara, who some regard as Sri Lanka's best cricketer of all time (also known for being an eloquent, talented and grounded leader), said it better in his MCC Spirit of Cricket Lecture back in 2011:

".....But, while these would all be interesting topics, deep down inside me I wanted to share with you a story, the story of Sri Lanka's cricket, a journey that I am sure Colin would have enjoyed greatly because I don't believe any cricket-playing nation in the world today better highlights the potential of cricket to be more than just a game.

This lecture is all about the Spirit of the Game and in this regard the story of cricket in Sri Lanka is fascinating. Cricket in Sri Lanka is no longer just a sport: it is a shared passion that is a source of fun and a force for unity. It is a treasured sport that occupies a celebrated place in our society.

It is remarkable that in a very short period an alien game has become our national obsession, played and followed with almost fanatical passion and love. A game that brings the nation to a standstill; a sport so powerful it is capable of transcending war and politics. I therefore decided that tonight I would like to talk about the Spirit of Sri Lanka's cricket."

Another highlight to this match was that Kumar Sangakkara and Mahela Jayawardene - two of my favourite ex-captains/ cricket legends retired from the world of T20 cricket in style, despite being in good form. It was a good decision that'll make way for the younger generation of talent to move up the ranks.

The human race has engaged in various sports from the beginning of time. A sport has a great ability to merge human competitiveness with discipline and harmony. In an ideal world, instead of hate and violence, it builds character, unity and respect among the players. Often this constructive model projects outwards from the players in the field down to their supporters. Of course, we don't live in an ideal world and factors like human greed, corruption and political/financial interests have also fused itself with modern day sports.

While different sports bear significance to different countries, over time, this has often driven social change within its culture and its people. In some cases, it may have driven human rights reforms (or is it vice versa?) and we can now see non-discriminate participation from different races, genders and levels of physical abilities which in the distant past wasn't possible.

Good things

It's Friday, I'm thrilled for no particular reason and I'm in the mood for a post!

When I'm high in spirits, I tend to notice more of the good things that happen around me (and vice versa too). Like today, I was invited to a mini birthday celebration at work from a Project I don't even work in and treated to lunch by the good will of another person. Then I noticed that the friendly bus driver of a bus I take regularly greeted everyone one with a smile and he got the same reaction from most of them. Some even stopped to make mini conversations with him because he had an air of friendliness and helpfulness about him. Then I realised that in Singapore there is hardly a cop to be seen on the road and yet people behave in ways that are beneficial to them and others as they share a very small land space in close vicinity. It is amazing to think how a good intention of someone, even small, can have a ripple effect affecting several others.

Lately, I have noticed the posters below stuck in buses, trains and stations in Singapore. On digging up information about these curious posters, I learnt that the Land Transport Authority came up with the idea as part of the Graciousness Programme 2013 campaign. I must admit they've had a positive impact on me. I can't be sure if it is because it is unique (I have never seen this type of simplistic art style on a national level campaign in my time here) or if it is the powerful one-liners at the bottom that makes you question yourself loudly, but I like them and it is not often that I appreciate advertisements here.

This is my favourite one of the lot. The first time I saw these penguins asking me if I feel the same way, I wanted to shout a big "YES, I DO!" inside the train station. It's a good thing I have well functioning internal brakes that stop me from making an ass of myself.