The nun from hell

I shuttle between two offices during the week. Lately, I’ve been spending more time at my new office than the one at the UN compound.

This office is an old-fashioned, large, single-floor house that has been converted to a multi-purpose office. I learnt that this place has a lot of history. Even now, the building has remnants of various publications stacked up in shelves, novels written by a famous local author (deceased) and lots of artwork on the walls that depict womanhood through the eyes of various artists (they tell me there used to be many art workshops then). The place is owned by three NGOs that work on women’s rights. Things have quietened down now for women’s rights activists. Most of those young activists who started out many decades ago are old now, some have passed away and some have moved to other sectors like the environment (and that’s how I got to know some of them). Parts of the office have now been leased to other NGOs like ours.

Work of an unknown artist which is hung right opposite my desk. Pretty depressing sight, if you ask me. Shows a bride looking at a reflection of herself with two kids in tow, bent over a large pot of food while also doing other house chores. I'm going to request for a change of scenery! 

One lady remembers those glory days of theirs when they marched in the streets for women’s rights. She tells me that young people these days don’t like to do that. That’s true, I prefer to voice out from behind a laptop screen than shout out in the streets (even for environmental causes). My generation has it a little easier, I suppose. Back then, times were worse for women; there was more oppression, less opportunities in education and work, early marriages, female child labour, basically many things to fight for. Now there are little or no barriers in education for women in Sri Lanka. Career-wise, the gender ratios are healthier. Under-aged children working as "servants" (that's what they call them in Sri Lanka) are rare because laws are tough on people who try to exploit children. Under-aged marriages have reduced with better literacy rates. What remains are mostly the age-old issues like rape, domestic violence, power imbalance in marriages with a dominating male partner, unfair division of labour in marriages and objectification of women. These are the ongoing struggles of most women in vulnerable communities and some women in not-so-vulnerable communities.

This lady, who I assume is in her sixties tells me she worked hard and mostly voluntarily (to the dismay of her family sometimes) with NGOs when she was young to push for equal opportunities for women and bring about social reform. She’s quite the remarkable character and what strikes me the most is her skill in dealing with people from all social strata with ease; all the way from the top (politicians, high profile people, academics) to colleagues and down to the level of people who work for her (like her helpers and drivers) and people from low income backgrounds. Although she’s moved to the environment sector now, I could tell her passion lies in fighting injustice for women in marginalised and oppressed communities. She’s great (and hilarious) when it comes to conversations on open-minded topics, marriage, women’s reproductive rights, male chauvinists, religious leaders who take a keen interest on women’s genitals, injustice to the environment, etc. On field visits, she’s the best travel buddy anyone could wish for because she’s so curious to explore new areas, try new food from roadside places specially the home-cooked types, buy fruits and vegetables from small roadside vendors (and distribute to her friends later) and strike conversations with random people to learn about interesting facts. She still has so much fire and a thirst for adventure for her age that when I am with her, I feel it’s contagious. But this post was not meant to be about her!

This post is about another lady who used to work in one of the NGOs, again on women’s rights. I’ve been told she was quite the fire cracker back then. Now she’s become ordained as a Buddhist nun, lives forcibly in this office and emotionally blackmails anyone who tries to evict her, saying that they would go to hell. Normally, monks and nuns take up a life of simplicity, living on charity after having given up their material possessions, in order to focus on selfless service to the community and the pursuit of spiritual goals. On the other hand, this nun has become very possessive and has forcibly acquired furniture, appliances and even a scythe-like tool for cutting grass, claiming it’s hers now. There’s a box with a padlock in the kitchen, which I am told contains her kitchen utensils. She’s paranoid when vehicles comes to the office and goes, and she relies on a few neighbours to spy on “suspicious” activities in the office while she's not around. As I’ve also been told, she’s too curious and goes through our office belongings after we leave, so we have to lock up everything and leave nothing open on the tables. She acquires things like soap that has been put in the toilet for common use. She rarely speaks good of anyone, too, I hear. She’s basically impossible to communicate with, irrational, hasn’t developed the skills to respectfully co-exist with other people (which is why she can’t survive in a nunnery with other nuns) and uses the excuse of religion to establish some kind of authority over others through fear. Well, those fear tactics could work for someone who believes they can go to hell for offending anyone claiming to be a holy person or is wearing a uniform of a holy person.

Now everything I’ve heard so far are one-sided (yet similar) accounts from about three people. Being here only a few days, I am yet to meet this personality who sounds like a character from a tele-drama plot! On the other hand, it’s good to be informed. Given my hopeless level of assertiveness (as a close friend recently pointed out, I apparently have the assertiveness of a water flea), I fear I might be caught in the cross fire of these estrogen-powered politics and be expected to take sides. At times like these, I remember the ease with which I worked in an all-male team in my previous job. If there is no threat of harassment from male colleagues, things are much simpler and straightforward with men.

I'm no psychologist and my predictions of people have failed many a time. From what I’ve gathered about her behaviour, she appears mentally imbalanced and suffers from a variety of mental complexes like paranoia. She's most probably deeply unhappy, frightened and is probably a lonely soul inside. Also the relationship my colleagues have with her might be one full of misunderstandings and unaddressed emotions build over a long course of history working together, and therefore biased. 

Feeling compassionate for people exhibiting unnatural behaviour and trying to be nice to them or help them have almost always back fired on me, so I’m going to remain super cautious on this one. Also, this situation made me realise how much (good) relationships matter in life. You have to be ready to give as much as you are willing to take from the people around you.

On a positive note, I suppose we have to feel thankful to the women (and feminist men) before us, who fought for equal opportunities and created waves of change in society. The battles are not over, but it is because of their courage, defiance to conform, their struggles and their vision that we have the level of comfort we have today. So is it also not our duty to speak up for injustice (of any kind) when we see it around us?

E.T. settles in

Two years ago, after I made the somewhat unsettling decision to move to Sri Lanka, I felt like I was an alien that had unknowingly arrived at the correct planet. Many years prior to that, I felt that my interests in wildlife conservation were a little strange and highly idealised, even. Having spent a good part of my early life stuck in the obsession of being a veterinarian and eventually having to concede that it was not practically possible, I thought it was too late in life to ever find satisfaction in a closely related job and that I'd die with regrets. It was my stint at the Singapore Zoo that gave me a renewed sense of hope. I still work with more people (i.e. lesser animals) than I would like to, but I feel strangely at home in these circumstances I have fallen into. For the first time, I've found many more people like me (or better even), so much so that I am no longer an outlier in contrast. For once, I feel that talking about saving animals and having those conversations at work is not something that would raise eyebrows or sound silly enough for others to make jokes about it.

Yesterday at work, we completed a 2-day workshop for 18 NGOs (consisting of about 60 individuals) who will be working with the UNDP GEF Small Grants Programme for the next two years. Sure, there were small hiccups here and there, but our efforts in organising the event mostly paid off. Even though I was on the event management side of things, I learnt quite a lot of things on formulating projects according to the Logical Framework Approach (LFA) method, applications of Geographic Information System (GIS) tools in projects and the importance of using good communications.

On Day 1 of the workshop, I was put on the spot with a request to be the compère. Despite the great lengths I go to avoid standing behind a podium, I get cornered sometimes. And being an adult and realising I was one, I had to play it cool. First, I was given the simple task to welcome the participants, do a quick run through of the agenda and introduce the first speaker. Being me, I messed up, of course. I accidentally introduced the second speaker first. After that blunder, I fared better. Thankfully, I realise that with age, I am getting more humiliation-proof. Those small things that used to embarrass me and make me very anxious are becoming fewer in number. Even the really embarrassing things that happen, I realise, are but a moment that will be soon forgotten, or would end up a good lesson or become fodder for a good laugh in future. And these are all equally good outcomes.

On the morning of Day 2, just as I woke up, in a state of semi-sleep, I mentally drafted the best opening lines for the workshop. I come up with the best imaginary speeches at that time of the day and some of those speeches really blow me away. As usual, I remembered none of that when I stood behind the microphone. The segments where I had to use the microphone for bossing people around to remind them to hurry up, submit forms, etc, were easy. Someone I knew from my childhood once pointed out (to my surprise at the time, I admit), that I am bossy. This small talent of mine for pushing people around, especially if they are lazy, incompetent, uncooperative or ridiculous and reverses the "forward-flowing" energy of life can be good sometimes. It's no wonder that I took a liking to the quality assurance and regulatory compliance (i.e. policing) aspects of my previous profession, which involved setting things "right" (to accepted standards), despite the unpopularity. This is making so much sense now. But Shuri, you are lazy too!! Shhh, this isn't about me. 

The workshop left a profound impression on me. The participants were people from different walks of life who bid and won grants (through a tough selection process) for environment-based projects involving communities to improve things in Sri Lanka. To see the vision and ideas of how different people proposed to do things, including the introduction of innovative solutions, were very interesting. They spoke with passion. Sure, these were only at a conceptual level for now, sounding great on paper, and implementation on the ground would be a challenge. Still, it was nice to play with the thought that if done right and all these projects achieve a high success rate, it would be a great accomplishment. Given the little experience I have gained from this job, I know that there will be plenty of obstacles, for example, failures, mismanagement of funds, disputes, unforeseen circumstances, show-stoppers or even grantees losing interest, after the project kicks off.

The projects to be implemented touched on various areas like eco-tourism, agriculture, community livelihood development, increasing biodiversity and environment conservation. I have already taken a special liking to a few projects that focus more on wildlife.

One of the participants was a young lady (possibly under 30 years of age) who's made herself a name in the wildlife conservation circles here for being a passionate and driven individual. She's made it her life's mission to protect the Fishing Cat population living in the highly urbanised city of Sri Lanka's capital, Colombo. During the applications process, she wooed the panel with her charisma and youthful optimism in wanting to fight the odds to carry out her mission. Fishing Cats are nocturnal, so many city-dwelling people don't know about their existence or the decline of populations, unless they become roadkill or are caught and killed by people for attacking poultry. In her project, she's used the Fishing Cat as an indicator species to assess the health of Colombo's urban (inland) wetlands, which are its natural habitat range. This is a project I am looking forward to since it is going to involve the building of an animal rescue and rehabilitation center (* gets distracted thinking of Fishing Cat kittens * SHURI, focus on finishing this post with a serious tone!)

The Fishing Cat is found in various parts of Asia, including Sri Lanka (Image Source: http://www.fishingcatcambodia.org)

One project is going to increase nesting areas and habitats for the wildlife in urban Colombo, such as for the endangered Purple-face Leaf Langur, insectivorous bats, wetland birds and the Fishing Cat. With an increasing human population in the cities, animals are rapidly losing their homes. While we can't do anything about an increasing human population, there's hope in trying to help humans and wildlife co-exist. The project will also carry out various activities to remove invasive plants that are wiping out indigenous species of plants and slowly destroying the balance of wetland ecosystems. The person leading this project is also a passionate zoologist who volunteers his weekends to educate members of the Young Zoologists Association. He has experience in working with the National zoo and he led a project which was instrumental in establishing the only official wildlife rescue and rehabilitation centre in Colombo through a previous grant.

Another noteworthy project will be implemented by a university in the north of Sri Lanka. The project is led by a young gentleman (also under 30 years) who is a passionate zoologist and a probationary lecturer. He also wooed the panel with his subject knowledge, humility and his determination to improve the lives of the people in the area who were for decades affected by Sri Lanka's 30-year old civil war. Their project will involve the establishment of an outdoor laboratory for university students in the midst of a coastal wetland and will include boardwalks, etc. The site will also be promoted as an eco-tourism destination for activities like guided nature tours, boating and bird-watching for generation of income to the impoverished and isolated communities living in the area.

Another one of the projects is led by a leading herpetologist/ photographer. In November last year, he was part of a team that discovered the newest species of snake in Sri Lanka. In addition to that, his research findings have led to discoveries of over 20 (and counting) other new species which include snakes, amphibians, geckos and skinks in Sri Lanka. He didn't have a pompous air about him, despite his impressive career background. With my liking for reptiles, it was hard not to want to strike reptile-related conversations with him (nothing even remotely intelligent-sounding came to my mind, to be honest) or make him talk about his subject to satisfy my inner fan. I just stuck to small verbal exchanges relating to the workshop. I am happy and shameless to say I was able to manipulate the course of events and get a (group) photo with him in it. Seriously, Shuri!

It takes the coordinated effort of many individuals in various capacities to make a project a success. The grant that we (the organisation I work for) received was to oversee the knowledge management and capacity building aspect of several of these individual community projects located in the Colombo urban wetlands landscape. We are one of the mid-way links between the ground level and the funding agency. It will be our job to monitor progress, to facilitate project activities, to intervene when things are not going well, to link the ground level project persons with higher level authorities, to help communities to link their enterprises to larger market chains and finally, to use communication tools to showcase and document what the projects are up to and have ultimately achieved. Because ultimately, grant-based development work is part of a cycle where good work (as showcased by good publicity) will attract more sponsors and grants, which will in turn bring more opportunities to people and community level organisations to carry out good development work (mostly for the environment, in our case). That's the theory, at least.

On the downside, working with NGOs entails some effort to be optimistic and trust that people will maintain their good intentions and not become too corrupt in the face of extra money, and if they do, to be as vigilant as possible to close any loopholes that would allow it, without letting emotions run you over and make you form a too negative outlook in life. On the upside, there are several capable and driven people working in these projects, including young people who give the conservation field much hope, and there will certainly be a few successful projects that will leave a lasting impact. I don't know where life would take me in the next two years, but the end results of this phase of projects are something I'd really like to see.

I might be the Flash!

I really shouldn't be blogging because I'm supposed to have other priorities today. Sigh.

Yesterday, I set off to work from home, covering approximately 150 km in 4 hours to make it to an important meeting. On the same evening, I covered another 150 km in the bus and train to be back home to cover the B&B for two days while my mother was supposed to have a small medical procedure. Unfortunately, the return trip didn't have confirmed seats so it was two hours of standing in a crowded train until I finally got a seat to sit for the next one hour.

I was standing beside a young couple with a toddler. The toddler even smiled at me a few times and I smiled back of course. On principle, I make sure to acknowledge all smiles and waves from children. We shouldn't make them feel negative or rejected too early in life.

After some time, the people in the train were all lost in their thoughts as the train journey continued. I was daydreaming as usual while listening to calming music and watching the passing scenery when suddenly when one of the smaller bags in the overhead compartment above me fell. My hand reacted involuntarily and caught it mid air and it was only a split second after I caught it that I emerged from the depths of my daydreaming to realise what happened! I wanted to shake the people standing next to me and ask "DID YOU SEE THAT??? I'VE ONLY SEEN THE FLASH DO THAT BEFORE!!". I didn't of course, for fear of being thrown out of the train.

The Flash 

(Image Source: GTA 5 Mods)

It was a baffling experience for me. The best explanation I can think of was that I am the Flash! No, but seriously though, I think it was the presence of a toddler directly below the overhead compartment which kept a subconscious part of my brain alert since I recently watched a bag fall on a man sitting in front of me. That, or this incident never happened and I was just daydreaming all along.

Stress levels are really high these days and I'm trying not to go up in flames. Thankfully, there are plenty of good things going that keeps me afloat. Like learning new things on the job, or having moments of joy watching a sunrise from my seat in the train or having a group of incredibly supportive classmates (having similar levels of stress) to fall back on for lab reports, help with tutorials and revisions during exams.

From the Colombo Fort station

 Watching a sunrise always gives me a renewed sense of hope...

 ...and a reminder that each day can be a beginning of something new

 I even felt the warmth of the Sun's rays touch my skin through the train window. That, with the right music can easily take someone to Cloud 9.

What I need to do now is to find a way to shift to a lower gear because this hill is getting harder to climb.

Sweet delirium

This is a true story. In the event that the moral of this story becomes unclear, it is this: if you don't use a certain skill, you lose it.

My father who was an Engineer by profession is very good in his mathematics. I doubt there was anyone to match him in the family, except maybe his father. There's a small chance I am being biased, but there was never a mathematics problem he couldn't solve for me. Whenever I hit a brick wall in my school mathematics, my father was the last resort I turned to. Yes, the last.

That's because in asking him how to arrive at a simple answer like for my secondary school homework, I almost always ended up getting a 1-2 hour long lecture on how to derive the formula for the area of a circle or how to calculate large sums in my head without writing it down (calculators back then were a big No). With my very short attention span, it didn't take long before I lost interest and fidgeted in my seat. I sometimes thought of clever ways to expedite the lecture like cheating at mental math calculations by counting with my fingers under the table. I'm sure he saw right through me, but he never gave up and had the patience of a saint to repeat things. I didn't fully appreciate it much back then, but the mental training helped me greatly to cope and have a sustained interest in the subject till I passed high school. After that, I didn't have to use mathematics that much. And then came mobile phones with calculators. And Microsoft Excel with formulas to think for you.

For him, it was always about understanding the logic behind a calculation and breaking it down to the basics before attempting to solve it. Any seemingly ugly and complicated problem becomes clearer and simpler when you break it down to its roots. That logic even applies to life in general! And if any teacher succeeds in making students see mathematics in this light, it probably won't be the enemy it is today and more students might enjoy the challenge of finding solutions to mathematics problems.

Every subject has its own merits and demerits. For me, mathematics in school used to be a refreshing change to all the abstract, illogical, grey and subjective answers that other subjects accepted. No matter how you arrived at an answer, you either got the right answer or you didn't. Anyone made to understand the logic behind arriving at the answer, should theoretically arrive at the same solution. So it's no surprise that literature, poetry and art weren't my best friends in school and I struggled a lot with interpreting the true meanings and intentions behind certain words, phrases and actions. I still struggle with those sometimes.

A lot of people complain about what a waste of time primary and secondary schooling was and how we aren't using most of what we learnt, or remember anything for that matter. Some say that if we spent more time doing something related to a profession as early as possible, they would be a lot more successful in life. Well, probably. But how can anyone know what it is that we were going to end up doing? How can we know what our strengths and interests are without being put through different tests?

Besides being a convenient way to keep energetic children confined in one place for several hours, school is a place that gives exposure to various subjects and opens minds. It's not all a fun experience and every time I see small weary kids being dropped off school buses lugging heavy bags, I think to myself "Oh thank goodness I'm not in their shoes!". Even subject matter learnt in university for thousands of dollars becomes forgettable and redundant after a few years.

My take is that under pressure and repetitive actions, places like these are where our neurons become programmed to think in certain patterns and our brain makes complex connections which we don't always understand in full. And these complex associations come to our aid later as we make sense of the world around us and act out. School also helps to develop discipline, build character and social skills as we are forced to interact with other humans. So really, the subject knowledge that one graduates with is as temporary as the paper that one's degree conferment is printed on. The only way to retain some of that knowledge or any skill for that matter is by putting it to practical use. In the end, we are only as good as what we practice the most.

I'm not sure how much of all that made sense because a short while ago at the doctor's, I was told my immune system is compromised with a flu bug and that I'm infectious.

I've been tasked with the burden of keeping house-related accounts. And to finally arrive at the point of this blog, last week a nearly 30-year old me, messaged my father to ask how to calculate a simple secondary school mathematics problem. I asked Ryuu first, but although the answer was correct, I received a suspicious "$12 isn't much. Just pay it yourself and ask them to buy you dinner later" answer, after which I had concerns about Ryuu's current mathematical abilities.

The moment I sent that message, I got a call from my father right away. Really, it didn't warrant a call? Turns out my mother intercepted the message, read the first line and jumped into the speedy conclusion that I was having a mental breakdown and pushed my father to call me. I kid not. After misunderstandings were cleared by both parties, we had a good laugh.

My logic was flawed. The simple answer was 9x + 30x = 52

It was a little embarrassing, but family tends to forgive.

In other developments, captive rhinos are a lot gentler than I assumed. Two massive rhinos ran us to get a token feed of bananas (and stayed behind a big log) last weekend. They had huge slobbering lips. Giraffes are a lot faster than I imagined. One moment I had a carrot stick in my hand and in a split second, a long prehensile tongue appeared and the carrot stick vanished.

Our competitors from training last week extended a friendly gesture by inviting the losing team (that's us) to join them in sharing the prize of feeding these giant herbivores

An Autobiography: Approaching Full Circle

"What A Wonderful World" - A powerful 2 minute video that sums up what it is that we are going to lose if we don't change or get involved 

If we were to compare the Earth's habitable environment to a good family inheritance, we are not only spending it away faster than all the time it took our ancestors to save up, we are also borrowing credit from what might have been the inheritance of our descendants. As world's population increases and moves towards development, we have exceeded the Earth's natural capacity to supply in relation to the existing demand. Of course, we don't contemplate on this on a regular basis so the normal tendency is to passively navigate ourselves around the tell tale signs (and the not-so-obvious ones) towards comfortable and profitable goals that often provide instant gratification.

I'm guilty of it too.

Looking back from where I am now, my yearning to get involved in the conservation field has, somewhat ironically, taken me to United Arab Emirates and Singapore. These two countries topped the globe in terms of their ecological footprints (UAE at No. 3 and Singapore at No. 12) according to the WWF Living Planet Report of 2012. Not only that, I am currently an employee of the Oil and Gas industry which is largely responsible for the depletion of the Earth's natural oil and gas reserves and indirectly responsible for increased Green House Gas emissions in recent history. This is just one example of how our sophisticated lifestyles – just as they are interconnected with the Earth's biological ecosystems – are also dependent on activities setting the planet on an irreversible course of destruction. The way I see it, we are all (to varying degrees) part of the problem and part of the solution to this environmental crisis.

Sri Lanka is a country with abundant natural resources having one of the highest biodiversity densities of Asia and I called it home for the first 18 years of my life. As a child, I loved spending my time outdoors, doing regular rounds of “garden patrol”, observing various plants and animals that were a common sight and spending time by a river that flows beside my house. One of my greatest joys was rescuing injured, sick or abandoned animals and nursing them back to health. It was a role I took up very seriously and for which I had the full support of my parents. 

I was also fortunate to spend various phases of my childhood with my two grandfathers, from whom I have learned much about using resources in a "sustainable manner" - a term I didn't come across until many years later. My maternal grandfather was an advocate of “reduce, reuse and re-cycle” policy where he carefully made the best use of all paper, plastic, metal, glass and wood until they had no more uses. My paternal grandfather supported the livelihood of local farmers and he himself was a passionate planter who selflessly left behind the fruits of his agricultural labour for the benefit of his future generations. With those early influences, among others, caring for the environment that sustains us may be associated to me with a sense of obligation rather than being just a passion. 

Since arriving in Singapore in 2004 to do my undergraduate studies, I've had all my basic necessities and creature comforts. However, growing up was a slightly different affair in Sri Lanka. We had to live in a sparing manner since most basic resources such as water and electricity were limited and we were constantly affected by power outages and periods of drought. My village didn't have the infrastructure to tap into the national water supply, but we were fortunate enough to have naturally occurring wells and a river nearby for basic needs for water. 

Dubai was my home for a brief 2.5 years while I completed an overseas work assignment from 2010 onwards. The United Arab Emirates is a rapidly developing country and Dubai is a melting pot of foreigners from all over the globe. The new environment, new challenges, new acquaintances and my new-found sense of independence suited me well. My boss who was a co-owner of the company took an interest in my potential and supported me in becoming a certified ISO 9001:2008 Quality Management Systems Internal Auditor to audit company policies and procedures, although it was not my main scope of work. After trying out various responsibilities within the company, I realised that my personal strengths and continued interest in relation to a career would lie in work that required careful observation, attention to detail and doing lots of writing.

It is easy to assume that a rich desert city such as Dubai which is heavily dependent on the abundant natural oil and gas resources in the region to maintain its luxurious artificial splendor would have zero interest in conservation. However, even there I found active conservation groups such as EWS-WWF and the Emirates Marine Environmental Group (EMEG) which organises environmental awareness and conservation activities (most notably their turtle rehabilitation and release programs). On a hopeful note, both these groups had a substantial number of passionate volunteers, young and old, supporting their causes. Within the UAE, I also managed to travel to places such as Fujairah (one of the seven “emirates” or states making up UAE) which had better weather compared to Dubai and coral reefs to be explored. Also within driving distance was Musandam (Oman) which was a popular location for dolphin watching. One interesting place that I could not visit in my time there was Bu Tinah Island - an official finalist for the “New7Wonders of Nature” competition in 2011.

The next phase of my life brought me back to Singapore in 2012 where I am currently employed as an ISO Quality Auditor. My work revolves around quality assurance for fabrication of FPSO (Floating, Production, Storage and Offloading) units and assisting with statutory/ regulatory compliance for these units sailing to offshore oil fields such as Brazil, Angola and the Gulf of Mexico. From an environmental perspective, my work contributes to ensuring that vessels leaving the port comply with the standards of the International Maritime Organisation (IMO) – most notably the MARPOL (Marine Environment Protection Committee of the IMO) Standards - to minimise marine pollution resulting from the vessels' gas emissions, sewage, garbage, oil discharges, ship recycling, ballast water and use of anti-fouling substances. 

But ideally, I want to do more.

In the past, I have enjoyed short volunteering stints with Nparks at Pulau Ubin, assisting the staff with guided board walks at Chek Jawa and conducting forest patrols to remove traps and snares. As a SEC Earth Helper, I once participated in a Horseshoe crab rescue and rehabilitation project which required the assistance of volunteers to remove the crabs entrapped in abandoned fishing nets at the Mandai mudflats and at the same time, doing a population survey of the two species of horseshoe crabs (mangrove and coastal) in the area. 

After trying out a few similar experiences, I've settled as a volunteer Docent at the Singapore Zoo (in the Reptile Realm) where I feel quite at home. For the past 2 years, I've been part of a team of volunteers that engages the public and spreads awareness of animals (in my case, reptiles) and help spread the conservation message. This activity brings much meaning to my personal mission as I get to share my knowledge with a growing number of members of the public who come in search of meaningful encounters with wildlife rather than mere entertainment. Not only that, I get to stay close to animals (such as during my Keeper Attachment) and meet and learn from people as passionate as I am (or more even) about wildlife and the environment. 

Decades later, though much has changed in my life in terms of location, occupation and attitudes since my time in Sri Lanka, working towards animal welfare and experiencing natural habitats still brings me the same joy. I feel a sense of relief every time I visit a nature reserve or a wildlife sanctuary or read about passionate conservationists like Sir David Attenborough or Gerald Durrell, or see someone throwing a trash into a recycle bin or hear of an innovative technology that uses sustainable energy sources - because despite the odds, there still is hope.

This environmental crisis that we face today is a grave one, with consequences already showing and affecting most of us. It helps to have passionate and conscientious people uniting and lobbying for climate change, loss of biodiversity and such, but without the support of governments to enforce adequate legislation and environmental management systems governing our industries, we may have already lost this battle to conserve biodiversity, reverse climate change and ensure a habitable planet for our future generations. Besides spreading awareness, on a personal level there is much we can do like volunteering, taking a little extra effort to recycle trash, reducing/ reusing the products that we have taken for granted, getting involved in pro-environment community activities and, for those who can, supporting conservation efforts financially.

Mother Earth, which we have stressed beyond her capacity, has the ability to heal herself given our support and time. But the question remains: how willing are WE to do what is required of us?

The final year of my twenties!

Holy shit! It's nearing end of July. As a result of not blogging regularly, be warned I'm probably going to burst in this blog.

I rushed home to get all of it out as much as possible, so I can make some extra space in my head to maintain a hypothetical vacuum.

10 years ago on July 19th, I landed in Singapore for the first time. What a saga it's been! So what's different between Shu now and the Shu who landed here 10 years ago? Summing up in a few words, I'd say the now-Shu is richer, more confident, wiser, more positive, more comfortable in her skin, happier and more out-spoken than that shy, timid 19-year girl who left home alone for the first time. It hasn't been a journey without adversity, but I've surfaced and I am doing alright. *Pats self on the back*

For all I know, the Shu of 10 years from now may find now-Shu to be highly conceited.

Sir Little John is away on vacation for 3 weeks! I was given a long list of to-dos in his absence but to be honest, without his actual presence, I drift to day dream mode too much. Actually, it's terrible. Left to myself, my hyperactive brain drives me crazy with mind chatter. I foresee more blog posts in the next few weeks.

We are bombarded these days with disturbing news of the second Malaysian passenger plane MH17 that met with an unfortunate disaster resulting in the loss of 298 precious lives. Not only that, there's more unrest and violence going around all over the world. I wish people would just stop trying to hurt and kill each other. In other curious news, the local library board has come under fire for planning to destroy three children's titles after it received e-mail complaints that the books are not "pro-family". Following public criticism, two of the remaining books have been moved to the adults section, where parents can opt to let their children read it under supervision.

And Tango Makes Three (based on a real zoo story) features two male penguins who behave as though they are a couple and raise a chick.

Shu thought to herself "Let's eat some non-Asian-ish dinner tonight - you know, food that hasn't been boiled beyond recognition or bathed in a sea of spices". So a cup of home made (and home grown) avocado milkshake, with raw tomatoes and a fat mushroom bun it was.

I went to a spa today. Who knew a simple bookworm can get rewarded with a complimentary spa on their birthday month for being loyal member of a particular book store chain! I double checked with trusted friend/ bookworm Katy Kat to make sure it wasn't some prank because it sounded too good to be true. I went anyway. And it was a good call. I explored a new area of Singapore and just like they promised, I relaxed my tensed muscles, reduced water retention and enhanced my blood circulation. Look at me blogging away!

After the "aromatherapy wellness treatment" and as I expected, I was enticed to sign up for an attractive 10-session package deal at $680 ("Interest free installments for credit card payment!! Get 2 additional sessions for free!! Get 12 body scrub sessions also for free if you sign up today!! Let me talk to my manager to get you a special 7-session package at a students' rate!!" Why, I'm not even a student). 

I guess I've become better at politely declining persuasive sales people. When faced with such situations, I now picture myself to be a brick wall and watch them attempt to walk past it after I've nicely said "No, Thank you." *evil grin* 

It took many years to develop this skill. I remember an occasion when as a student, I responded to quiz on TV and was notified I was the winner of a free facial and skin consultation session with a leading skin care company. I was a beggarly student back then and willing to pounce on any free lunches that came my way (Really Shu?? Didn't you go claim a free spa session just today??). So I went feeling like a real winner and after a pampering facial session, two aggressive saleswomen cornered me in a room and coerced me to sign up for a package deal. I desperately refused many times saying I only had a couple of hundreds left in my account to live through an entire vacation month and spending $180 was not an option, but they didn't let it go. In the end (very nearly in tears), I signed up just to get away from there, wasted a precious $180 and never even went to claim those paid facial treatments. I ended up borrowing cash from a friend to live through that semester break.

Another one of my housemates is leaving the country next month and we're down to two in a big house. Very unwillingly and with the intention of retaining our comfortable apartment, we advertised our master room to potential tenants. Day before yesterday, our new flatmates moved in. To protect their anonymity, I shall call them Brother Bear and Goldilocks. Sharing a living space with other humans is not always fun (they could be serial killers, for example) so I drafted a lengthy list of terms of conditions in case we end up with a bad experience. Also if problems escalate, a nitpicky and passive aggressive Shu is not pleasant to deal with.

Dear Brother Bear and Goldilocks,

We are happy to welcome you both as our flatmates! [Well, sort of.] 

Here's a re-cap of what we agreed on before you moved in and a few other things (that we may have failed to mention that day) which is better agreed upon as early as possible. If you have any concerns on any of the items below or want to add in any other conditions, we can discuss further.

1. The Contract
Your agreement with us is for the use of the master room from 19 July 2014 to 31 December 2014.
The monthly rent for the master room should be paid no later than the 28th of every month.
You will have to pay a little excess for the utilities in case you have family members visiting and the monthly bills go above average.
You will receive 1 copy of the keys for the master room, front door, gate and mailbox.

2. Utilities Usage
Your rental amount includes water, electricity and Internet (wi-fi).
Air conditioning is not included in your rental amount, but if you need it, we can arrange it at an additional charge since our monthly utility costs will then increase and there will be regular AC unit servicing charges.
You are free to use the Cable TV service while it is available and this will be considered as "complimentary".
We also hope that you will exercise good judgement in conserving water and electricity.

3. Use of common areas, appliances and other items
All common areas in the house can be used freely without restrictions.
Common appliances such as the washing machine, kettle, toaster, rice cooker, microwave, oven, TV and iron are for everyone's use with no restrictions.
Common expenses like the gas cylinder for cooking, toilet paper, kitchen towels, dishwashing liquid, cleaning fluids, small repairs not covered by the landlord, etc will be charged to the common house account to be shared by all of us.
Normally anyone can buy common items required, retain the receipt and claim it later.
Please buy your own laundry detergent.

[We missed to mention not to leave the toilet seat up. Grrr.]

4. Food
We have no restrictions on your cooking schedules.
You can use any of the utensils (saucepans, cups, dishware, etc) available in the kitchen.
For convenience, let's manage our accounts separately for food items such as vegetables, rice, bread, tea, milk powder, sugar, other groceries, etc.

5. Visitors
As a gesture of courtesy, please inform us in advance if you are expecting any visitors.
For the comfort of everyone, we try to entertain our visitors with minimal disturbances to the main tenants.

6. Keeping our living space clean
As agreed, we will take turns to clean the common areas in the house (hall, toilet upstairs, kitchen + toilet downstairs + laundry area) within the agreed dates.
Cleaning will be done at least once a month or more if required .
General cleanliness of common areas and courtesy is expected for the comfort of all tenants e.g. not leaving dirty dishes in the sink for too long, emptying dustbins regularly to keep away cockroaches, keeping the fridge clean and free of old food, cleaning any spills, removing laundry from the clothsline when dry, etc.

7. Renewal of contract
Subject to agreement from you and us, we can consider renewing the contract for another term of 6-months or 1-year. This can be finalised around Oct-Nov 2014. Note that the final approval lies with the landlord and the Housing Development Board.

8. Termination of the contract
As this is a 6-month contract and our ability to keep the house depends on us having enough people to share the total rent, we hope you will understand that and not terminate the contract early so we won't have to go through the trouble of looking for new tenants once again or end up paying more individually till our contract ends.

9. Conflicts of interest
Let's agree to communicate openly and directly on any concerns so we can resolve them early and avoid any unpleasant situations. 

Please review all of the above and let us know if you have any concerns. Otherwise, drop us a reply to confirm your acceptance of our conditions. [WE HAVEN'T SEEN AN ACKNOWLEDGEMENT YET.]

Thanks and we hope you will have a comfortable stay in your new home in Singapore.


It's late, and I should probably blog about my holiday in Sri Lanka another time. 

PS: I turned 29 this month! 

Dragons and Adopted Families

Last week was a very socially active one with farewells and celebratory treats and get-togethers. I even squeezed in How to Train Your Dragon 2, but more on that later. Normally, I would shy away from the thought of social gatherings because they are physically (and sometimes mentally) draining, but at my age I have become bold enough to say "No" to gatherings I really do not like and only accept invitations to ones I like. I consider the gatherings with people I like to be worth the after-effects of socialising which include lacking sleep, energy and focus the next day.

Starting with home cooked Sri Lankan food last Sunday, my insides also went on a gastronomic tour around the world experiencing Vietnamese, Chinese, Indian, Italian, Thai and Moroccan cuisine one day after another. I have new-found admiration for Vietnamese food after discovering their vegetarian options. After last week's over-indulgence, I am determined to eat nuts, berries and tree bark for the rest of the month.

Last Thursday, I was late to work (socializing from the night before) and had to work late to finish the backlog. Earlier, when I had checked the times for the MUCH anticipated dragon movie, there was only one cinema quite far away from my place that was showing a 3D version of the movie so I gave up on the idea of watching it on release day because for me it was either 3D or no movie at all. But in a twist of fate around 7:00pm, another colleague who worked late offered a lift to the very same city showing the 3D movie. I jumped on the offer and caught the 9:30pm movie on my own and got home a few minutes after midnight!

Waiting at the bus stop to catch a bus home around 11:30pm when most of the people were safety tucked in their beds. Thankfully, a female can travel alone at that time of the day in Singapore and not worry much about it. 

I suspect I'm too biased about the movie franchise to give an objective review (after all, I waited only FOUR long years for the second movie), but I LOVED EVERY BIT OF IT!!! I was grinning and laughing for most of it and was left desperately wanting to have a dragon-friend like Toothless. Ahh IF only...

~ ~ ~ 

Lunch hour with my three colleagues at work is the highlight of my work day. It sort of reminds me of the social circles I had in Dubai which I miss very much. Sometimes, a mix of different people from different corners of the globe come together so randomly and a perfect recipe is born and like good wine, it ripens with time. Even the colleague who I used as the prime example of extroverts in my research study has grown on me and I've come to realise she's a gem in a sea of ordinary humans. Maybe it's knowing that as projects come and go, this little group will cease to exist in a few months but for now, everyone in it is happy to give and take. 

In this group of four, there's the extroverted story-telling mother goose who's very loving, clever and funny. Then there's the caring, religious, health-conscious elder sister who baffles us with her mysterious mood swings. Also there's the wise, smart, thoughtful workoholic younger brother who's a bit of a mischievous bully sometimes and there's me - the somewhat quiet observer who enjoys watching the group dynamics with much amusement. Sure, we all have our imperfections but we seemed to have been able to leave them behind with all the other differences and meet at a place that we are all happy and comfortable.

What everyone in this group has in common are humble beginnings and a deep attachment to their families, perhaps more so than the average person I'd meet in Singapore. Coming from remote towns and villages in Third World countries, growing up with little, having to take care of their families, putting up with inconveniences and working extra hard at times in life are some of the things that's shaped everyone in this gang in one way or another. And because of this, being in much better circumstances in life now has not changed the 'generous and grounded factor' that lies in all of them. Being in their company, I am constantly reminded to be humble, positive and less selfish. For this, I've come to admire them very much. 

The topics we share at lunch are mostly the reflective and enriching types - travel, family, food, jokes, movies, psychology, history, economics, politics, science - and not the superficial types about other people's personal lives that would easily drive me to boredom. The more life stories I hear from these interesting people, the more pieces I get to weave a bigger mental fabric about each of individuals. I think the study of people and why they act the way they do fascinates me.

In more food news, I finally discovered the Sri Lankan food stall situated at Tekka Market in Little India. The food there was pretty decent and it was good to get a familiar taste of home. 

Raja Bojun (loosely translated as "food fit for Royalty") at Little India

Who did what??

It pays to be a "No Man" sometimes.

Another good movie of Jim Carrey's

Usually, a blinding flash of lightning hits us a few moments before the accompanying roar of thunder. And just like that, sometimes, Shu's speech - the inability to say "NO", rather - precedes her thoughts associated with common sense. And so Shu ignorantly gets into all kinds of sticky situations. Once when she was lost in an industrial park, she readily accepted a lift in a lorry full of workers who she had never met before. When the gravity of the situation kicked in (riding in a lorry full of unknown men), she was already seated in the front seat of this lorry, answering away questions from the helpful driver who eventually did drop her at the gate of the place she was looking for. Another thing she is  brilliantly good at is saying "YES" when actually she wanted to say was "NO". Like today, she failed at turning down a dinner invitation from a chatty old senior colleague. When the thunder finally hit - the awkwardness of meeting a colleague outside work to chat about work ALONE - she panicked and desperately thought of means for damage control. Now she hopes that he will be hit by a temporary bout of dementia by next month and forget all about the invitation.

~ ~ ~

Singapore is a haven for foodies. And today, I have various raw ingredients suitable for a blog rojak.

The Urban Dictionary defines "rojak" as follows;

A delicacy in Singapore. Mixed with various ingredients. There are the Chinese Rojak, and the Indian Rojak. Different ethnic flavours come from different methods of mixing and different ingredients.
The Chinese version normally include a base of lemon sauce and a sweet gravy. Ingredients include fried fritters (Yew Char Kuay), Fried beancurd (Tau Pok), Beansprouts (tau gay), Pineapple (Ong Lai), Cucumber, Radish, and sprinkled with peanut crumbs.
The Indian flavour constitutes a melange of colourful fried foods, potato, fish cakes, and many more yummies! This rojak is normally accompanied with a sweet red coloured sauce.

~ ~ ~

I'm not sure if I should be happy or sad about the load of junk to-be-recycled we collected this month. On one hand it is a bit shocking to see that a 3-4 person household accumulated this much of recyclable junk in roughly a month, but on the other hand it is comforting to know that some of it went to a recycling plant instead of a landfill or an incinerator. 

    

                       Junk load on 1st February 2014                  Junk load on 19th February 2014

~ ~ ~ 

I like setting out to work in the crack of dawn. I've always loved the sense of calmness this time of the day brings. Apart from stars, there are less vehicles on the road, less people bustling about, the winds are cooler, bird calls are distinct and thoughts sound louder. I meet pensioners, joggers, security guards, cab drivers washing their cars at gas stations, students and working adults who, like me, start their day early. 

Vendors at the wet market starting their day early

~ ~ ~ 

Remote desktop connections leave me very amused. When I was a kid, I recall watching a TV show called Ghostwriter, where a group of kids communicated with a friendly ghost through mediums related to words and writing to solve mysteries. So the other day when the Notepad window below suddenly popped up while I was doing my work, I was immediately reminded of Ghostwriter. Also when I'm deeply involved in my work, I automatically assume that the computer monitor is an extension of my mind, so when "Ghostwriter" popped up at work, for a moment there I felt possessed!

It was just a colleague from the IT department who likes creeping up on people through remote desktop connections

~ ~ ~ 

My ongoing research into male behavioral patterns using specimens at work have shed light on some interesting areas. Though previously thought to be uncommon behaviour among these creatures, gossiping, expressing feelings and an affinity for drama have all been commonly observed. 

Scenario 1:

X: Do you have any air freshner with you?

Y: No, why?

X: The guy sitting in the neighboring cubical farts all the time and it's unbearable

Y: That's disgusting (giggles).

Scenario 2:

A: What does she do now?

B: She's working at a new company. And I heard she got divorced too.

A: Oh really?

B: Yeah...what happened?

Scenario 3:

G: Ever since you got transferred, I have really missed you man.

H: Yeah, I missed you too.

G: I should try to get you transferred back here.

Scenario 4:

Boss: DID HE JUST FART?? I heard it right through the wall!!

Shu: Yeah, I heard that too.

Boss: Giggles hysterically

Shu: *straight face, Shu, straight face* *dammit*

Shu: HAHAHAHA

The Departures Terminal

And just like that, February creeped up upon us.

Shu was quite occupied the last few weeks in a string of social commitments, from playing host/ tour guide to a young traveller to bidding farewell to three friends who left the country to catching up with her closest pals. Meanwhile, she's also had a life-changing shift in her daily routine...

For someone who has voiced out the challenges of associating with extroverted friends, I ought to be more grateful for the bountiful opportunities that come while being in their association. One day while taking the bus with my colleague, I was introduced to a staff from the Human Resources department. Left to my own, I would have looked in the opposite direction of fellow passengers, plugged my earphones and gazed out of the window dreamily at the trees and clouds and people passing by. But on this day, I was forced to make an effort to socialise with the new acquaintance, during which time I learnt there was a company sponsored bus meant for expats working on special projects, about 7 bus stops away from my house. Soon after, I inquired further and got an exception to take it. This arrangement has given me not only financial savings and convenience, but also an extra 1.5 hours in the day equaling to an additional 9 hours in my week, which is pretty awesome! Now my routine looks like this:

5:00am - Wake up, have tea, make breakfast and get ready for work
5:55am - Leave the house and walk 2.5km to bus pick-up point while investigating celestial objects in the pre-dawn sky with Google Sky Map (or just take a quick 10-minute public bus ride if I don't feel like walking 3900 footsteps for exercise)
6:30am - Get into the company sponsored transport bus
7:00am - Arrive at work
5:00pm - Leave work
6:00pm - Arrive at home (on days without social commitments)
10:30pm - Go to bed (on days without social commitments)

The bearings of my office transport in relation to my apartment are (it's cooler to think of it this way):
Follow Venus until I pass 3 gas stations, then with Venus on my left, follow the Crux constellation until I arrive at a small white bus filled with sleepy zombies dressed in white coveralls.

 

Early morning notes: Venus and Saturn are in view these days, but Saturn's too far away to distinguish from other stars without a telescope. Venus, on the other hand, is hard to miss.

Hurrah!! Now my evenings are enriched with reading books, watching TV, playing games on the xbox, blogging and having home-cooked dinner. I even took out my dusty violin yesterday, tuned it using a phone app and attempted to play a few familiar tunes! My violin playing skills have degraded with time but it felt good to be reunited with the instrument.

~ ~ ~

Going to the same school for the first 15 years of my schooling life had its perks. I grew up with friends and teachers who were part of my life for extended periods of time, giving rise to several fulfilling friendships that I maintain to this day. Not only that, I've been lucky to have several mentors who took a special interest in teaching me, guiding me to better places and unknowingly shaping me to what I've become (apparently, a caterpillar who blogs when she is not working!).

I had a Mathematics teacher who taught me from Grade 6 all the way up to A/Ls. Her classes were very entertaining. When she was around, the boys in class got extra cheeky and brought out their comical sides. She was a short-haired, smart, upbeat, loud, eccentric, fun-loving, kind-hearted being with the gift of reaching out to children with various personalities, most notably, the ones with special needs like bullies, lost sheep, the troubled ones and the weird ones. She tutored many kids at her home for no cost just to help them pass exams and I benefited a lot from this kindness and generosity. I figure that her super power of reforming kids was that she gave them a chance to be heard before attempting to throw in any elderly advice. In return, these kids grew to trust her, respect her and allow themselves to be guided by her good advice. I still try to make time to visit her whenever I go home and it seems she hasn't aged a day! I suppose being with youngsters all the time keeps you young at heart.

I think being a teacher is a sort of investment. Apart from being able to change many lives for better and basking in the satisfaction of having done so, the "seeds" (which are the students, in this case) that germinate disperse far and wide, often creating waves of positive change themselves. The exceptional teachers will always be dearly remembered and have an army of grown up ex-students around the globe.

The young traveller I had to host was the daughter of this teacher. She was on a university semester break and was sent to Singapore by her mother who assumed that Shu could be trusted with the job of keeping an eye on her precious 23-year old. It was her first ever overseas trip. I prepared in advance for her arrival making lists of instructions for her to follow and stocking up on food supplies, taking her multitude of allergies into consideration. The only thing we could not get rid of completely was Ginger.

Thankfully, the girl was smart and independent and managed well on her own during the day. Every evening after work, for 5 days, I met her and took her around like it was my second job being a tour guide. One evening, I caught her high as a kite and awfully chatty (a lot chattier than her usual self). On inquiring further, I learnt that she had an eventful day where she met a roadside guitarist who had serenaded her with a beautiful song, met another traveller with whom she had a nice chat and then gone on to take a relaxing boat ride along the Singapore River to see the city's splendour by night. It brought back warm memories of my solo travels in Paris. Tiring as it was, this streak of touring around the prettier places of Singapore during Chinese New Year was a welcome change for me.

 Traditional Chinese music to depict the onset of a New Year

The famous Clark Quay of Singapore with its happening night life and traditional river boat rides

The young traveller had a memorable trip, overwhelmed by the contrast between the two countries and their cultures. She was mostly blown away by the skyscrapers, apartment buildings housing a large population, the variety of food, the mix of races, the sense of law, order and cleanliness of Singapore.

~ ~ ~ 

Earlier this week, I bid farewell to one of my housemates who moved on from Singapore to fulfil her long-term ambitions. We've had a very coincidental timeline of life events where, with no prior planning or discussion, we have found ourselves in the same location time and time again. I have come to think of her as my non-biological twin. 

Our coincidental timeline of life events

We met in pre-school and went on to be best friends in Grade 2. As far as I can remember in pre-school, she had the cutest short hair with lots and lots of tiny curls. We exchanged stickers and went swimming together and got picked up and dropped in school by our elder sisters (who coincidentally, were also classmates). I recall she was among the smartest and the most talented in class. She was also the fastest runner among all the girls and most of the boys! Then she had to leave the country with her family to Oman and unfortunately, we couldn't keep in touch. I also happened to leave to a new school for a year and a half, until I could take it no longer and begged my parents to let me go back to my old school. When I returned to my old school in Grade 4, 'lo and behold, there she arrived in the same class a few days later! Though we were separated into different classes, went on to have different friends and grew distinctly different personalities, we always acknowledged each other with much fondness.

There's another amusing conversation I recall in Grade 6 when girls in the class used to disappear for extended periods of time, one by one. In our country, they make a HUGE fuss over a girl's "coming of age". While the specific traditions for each race differs, the general theme for most races is that once she hits puberty, she will be immediately confined in a room in the most hush-hush tones (in some cases up to a month!), away from the eyes of males relatives and friends. During this time, she is fed with very specific food. Female friends would take turns to keep company to this poor, confused soul quarantined in a room, who constantly wonders what all this fuss is about. Meanwhile, the parents consult astrologers for auspicious times, get tailored suits, whitewash the house and prepare for a grand party to announce to everyone that she is now sexually mature (it's quite a disturbing thought if you asked me). When it is finally time for her to make a public appearance, she is presented very extravagantly to all her relatives and close friends of the family, who arrive with gifts like gold jewellery, cash for the savings account, material to sew dresses, kitchen utensils, etc (all being utterly useless gifts for a 12-year old girl). When I spoke to other friends about the experience, some say for them it was a quiet affair without any public announcements but I've also met others who had parties in the epic proportions of a mini-wedding.

Got a bit carried away there, explaining a peculiar tradition!

So yes, I vaguely recall the two of us having a conversation that went something to this effect (though I don't know if she remembers it in the same way or if we were not talking about the same thing!):

She may have noticed me handing over the letter of absence to my teacher...
Chuti: Were you absent?
Shu: Yes, for about 2 weeks.
Chuti: Hey, me too! I just got back.
Shu: Er... did you also?
Chuti: Yes! haha
Shu: Haha
Awkwardness engulfs us...

She left to another school shortly after the O/Ls, but we were delighted to meet again in university doing the same course. After graduation, she went to Dubai for work and when she returned to Singapore a few years later, I left to Dubai for work. A few years later when I returned to Singapore, unemployed, she welcomed me to her house and looked after me until I got on my own feet and we remained housemates until she left Singapore earlier this week.

She maintains a deep fascination for Egyptian history, dinosaurs, Garfield and fashion design

We saw eye-to-eye when it came to the special needs of introverts, being considerate for the benefit of those around us, being sensible and fair. I'll certainly miss having her around, but I'm inspired to see her actively pursuing her ambitions with much patience and determination! And who knows, we may even bump into each other again.

Good luck, Chuti! xx

Voices in the head

Recently, my company introduced a scheme where late comers have their wages docked. It's proven to be very effective so far. I have begun to notice my consistent punctuality in the mornings.

The conversations in my head in the mornings no longer go like this:

VOICE 1: Ah crap. It's the alarm.
*hits snooze* x several times
VOICE 2: Ok, now it is really time to get up and catch your bus.
VOICE 1: Can't we catch a cab just for today??
VOICE 2: NO. It is expensive (not to mention environmentally unfriendly).
VOICE 1: Screw you. *rolls over and sleeps a few minutes more*

Instead, they go:

VOICE 1: Ah crap. It's the alarm.
*hits snooze* x several times
VOICE 2: Ok, now it is really time to get up and catch your bus or you will have your pay docked and have to pay for a cab.
VOICE 1: GAH. *rolls out of bed*

Interestingly enough, my 17 minute segment of the train commute coincides with Singapore's sunrise. Watching the sunrise gives a renewed sense of hope. Today, I couldn't help myself think, "Mr Sun, you have been rising and shining for us everyday for the last 4.5 billion years, without so much as a holiday. I suppose I can't complain much about my work."

Flattery and flirtations seem to have the opposite effect on me. They are not met with the reaction the flatterer/ flirter expects.

Shu's automatic response to flattery and unwelcome flirtations.

Office Pro

My boss has an interesting personality. He is funny and full of wise sayings (the most notable one being "Opinions are like assholes. Everybody's got one"). One of the perks of working in an all-male-except-Shu team is that I am constantly amused by the swear words and associated phrases flying around, strewn in very creative combinations. That and the absence of female hormones (except mine) affecting judgements and team dynamics makes it a conducive environment for working 60 hours a week.

Lately, my boss has discovered a new productivity tool: Shuri.

He's great at talking and I'm better at writing so he's been conveniently handing over the team's job of drafting diplomatic emails to me. Not just diplomatic ones, but also emails sent out with specific outcomes in mind. My boss is eternally snowed under his work and taking off some of the burden of grammar and organising thoughts in writing, which a lot of technical people deeply dislike, makes his work life more productive. And since I get a small high out of writing (pretty much anything), I'm mostly okay with the arrangement... except for the slight fear that he's becoming overly dependent on me to be his voice and that people might start to notice my alpha-male-type boss starting to sound like a thoughtful woman in his emails!

He also says that it is not so much what you ask, but how you ask that makes all the difference. Without the body language factor, written communication often leads to misunderstandings in tone.

Following an explosive reaction to an email...
Boss: Shu, please draft an email for me. I just forwarded you the email.
Shu: Ok, so what do you want to tell him?
Boss: Tell him to fuck off and tell him I know my job and I don't want him to remind me.... in diplomatic words, please.
Shu: .....

Another scenario...
Boss: Shu, ok this email has a lot of history, I have forwarded you all the emails to read up and understand the background. Let me know when you've caught up.
Shu: Done.
Boss: This is how I want to structure the email... (goes on the explain the details in length). Did you get all that? You look a bit lost....
Shu: Um... that's a lot of information.
Boss: You look lost most of the time, but when I see what you've done afterwards, I realise that you understand things pretty well.
Shu: Gee. Thanks.

Men are usually terrified of reactions coming from women because they don't know what to expect sometimes:
Boss: Shu, I need your help on this one. This email is going out to a woman. We can't afford to piss her off. Please see if anything is even remotely offensive in this draft.
Shu: O_O

It's funny how one letter can change the meaning of a sentence and trigger the imagination of a hyper-active mind. The other day, I received an out-of-office-reply which read as follows:

Thank you for your massage. I have limited access to emails and will respond when I get back on 29th July.