My Bumblebee

Transformers 3 was a hit! WOW... is all I can say to the crew who put that movie together.

With effect immediately, Chariotte has been been rechristened to Bumblebee!

Some days ago, my 3.5 year old nephew nearly gave me a heart attack. He calls me "Ammil". I was keeping an eye on him, while working on my laptop, when he edged closer and asked very gently,

"Ammil, you're a boy, Ammil?"

Shuri: [shock and horror] Noooooo! Ammil is a girl.

Nephew: Okay.

(five minutes later)

Shuri: Is Ammil a girl or a boy?

Nephew: A girl.

Shuri: That's right!

(Another 5 minutes pass by)

Shuri: Do you know if Ammil is a girl or a boy?

Nephew: Ammil is a girl.

Shuri: Yes! What a clever boy!!

The Sidewalk

Where was closure when I needed it?

I keep looking back, while holding on to a distorted memory of what once was. One where the good times seem more prominent than the bad times, when I know that's not right. I keep going back to those days, those very dark days. I have a million memories tied to you. Ever so often, something I see or hear triggers a connection to you and that past we shared. I wonder what you've become. I wonder if you are still picking up pieces, just like I am. Maybe you've moved on, like I have. Perhaps you are happier now, as am I. I try to forgive myself, hope you do too. I hope you've realised that things turned out for the best.

My nuts

Some days are so exceptionally perfect. Let's see what factors kept Shu high on life today :)

1. Someone messaged from back home to say a plant I gave them long back had its first little guava fruit!
2. Received two compliments in recognition and appreciation at work
3. Listened to a troubled colleague ramble about a personal issue, she actually thanked me for listening later
4. Prioritising and helping out a colleague on a shared project within 15 mins of request, during very busy hours
5. Was warmed to see a friend happy with potential blackmail material I sent, along with a much-loved book
6. Apologised for being petty to the sister on a row we had earlier today
7. Spoke with the mother and spent some quality "dad-son" time with the dad
8. Emailed two long lost acquaintances just to say hi, and they will be pleasantly surprised tomorrow
9. Shared food at work, actually I keep nuts (to increase my protein intake) on my table and people are drawn to it like chipmunks!

Sucker.

I also got a crash course on basic vehicle maintenance best practices from my dad. I re-learnt how check tyre pressure and inspect brake oil, power steering oil, engine oil and radiator water levels. Apparently, good drivers are supposed to do regular checks, as opposed to ignorant drivers who wait to complete 3000km so the guys at the service station can check it for them! If you are really unfortunate, you can miss out on a leak and have your engine choke and die. Replacing a new engine is probably as expensive as a getting a heart transplant.

Computers, vehicles, cameras, robotics - all these seem to draw design inspiration from the human body.

Another awkward alcohol-based company function... luckily, designated drivers can't drink.

but WoOHoO it's the weekend after that!!!!

When in Rome

Believe it or not, we are now global citizens. If you think about it, outside of official travel documents, we are no longer comprised of one nationality; we have acquired bits and pieces of many nations thanks to improved global communications and the nomadic tendency for finding better opportunities.

There goes a famous saying, “When in Rome, do as the Romans do”.

That's exactly what I try to do. Sometimes it goes well, sometimes it doesn't. For example, when I lived in a predominantly Chinese culture, I tried everything within acceptable limits, from eating sticky rice balls, drinking flower teas and eating sea weed, to throwing litter in designated bins and asking restaurants to pack the leftovers of what I dined in for take-away. Now, in a predominantly Arabic culture, I tried the shisha, drinking exotic teas and getting henna paintings on my hands. It is sometimes impossible to isolate oneself from traditions unfamiliar to you when living in foreign country surrounded by these. It is an accepted idea that with trying out these, one is able to better appreciate foreign cultures and foreign counterparts, with whom you share a particular period of your life with.

Some time back, not so long ago, I went for a haircut (which normally costs about 70 in local currency). I was soon enticed to take up a limited period offer by the lady who gave me the haircut. It was the perfect deal; for 150 local currency, one would get to enjoy one main service (plenty to choose from!), and get two complimentary smaller services. My haircut being one of the complimentary services, I had to pick one main service and one smaller service. Getting hair highlights or a full body wax didn't appeal to me at the time. The lady was quick to recommend a "Moroccan bath" to me when I looked clueless and lost for choices. What the hell, I thought, my mom has made me have baths in various concoctions of boiled leaves, tree bark and dried roots, it can't get any worse than that! As for the smaller service, I picked a "30 minute shoulder massage" as I was suffering from a strained neck and shoulder at the time.

The day arrived, I was the first customer at the salon. I sat in the front couch, waiting to be called in and with no idea what this was going to be like. An elderly lady brought me a small cup of what looked like tea [What if this is spiked with something? Nevermind Shu, just gulp it down] which I drank hesitantly. It was actually herbal-ish and nice [There might be a tub full of this tea somewhere at the back, in which I'll probably have to soak in. This must be just the start to the experience]. Still waiting [Damn, I should have Googled this before I came. Why did I not think of it before? Oh wait, let me check with my sister]. I called my sister and asked her what they do and what I am supposed to do (she is a very reliable source of information on feminine issues). I was mortified when she told me "You'd be lucky if they let you keep your pants on" [WTF!!!]. Just when I was about to make a run for it through the front entrance, I was called in [HELP!].

Specific details of what happened next have been selectively wiped off my memory. I'll keep it short by saying, although I was lucky (by my sister's definition), I was scrubbed off of about 300 grams of dead skin cells (the horror!) by an elderly woman, old enough to be my mother. It was a thoroughly embarassing experience and even the soft and supple skin (that's how marketing materials word it, I believe) I had afterwards was not enough to counter the feelings of being nearly violated.

I wasn't going to pay absurd prices to a shrink to discuss this experience, that's why I had to blog about it.

"Madam, would you like the massage today as well?" [Are you freaking kidding me?? That's enough touching for a long, long while, thank you very much.]

My sister thinks I am overreacting, but I am certain that is the last Moroccan bath I will try (or the last Japanese public bath I will never try). I guess I won't be visiting that salon again either.

Follow me close behind

Blogs these days seem to be of the same topic (family!).

Ones who grow up without being able to have all their likes and needs fulfilled as children, either make resolutions to give their children the "better life" they never had or realise it's far better to teach them contentment and humbleness than spoil them. I don't particularly remember missing out anything important while growing up! Sure, there were countless times, my requests to have "that colourful book", or "that bicycle" or "the one my friends have" were turned down as they were off the family budget - but my mother always remembered to tell me why I couldn't have it and why I had to be okay with that. Many years later, that type of conditioning has me thinking several times on wants vs. needs before I make a purchase on something I set my eyes on. Sometimes it makes me sad to see a lot of parents "buying" their children convenient affection at toy stores or children being given every little meaningless thing they demand for, making them spoilt and oblivious on many levels. This is money that may be well spent on something more meaningful for the children.

I come from a middle income family, we were not heirs to fat inheritances from ancestors. At the time of my parents getting married (mom at 21 years and dad at 26 years), they barely had any savings. The only good thing going for them at the time was a decent job my dad held at the time. That meant my parents worked very hard to put us through a good education, which they recognised from the beginning as an important factor. My father spent many years fulfilling the role as the main breadwinner of the family. For nearly a decade he lost many opportunities to watch us grow, pass the most interesting milestones of our early lives and get to know us - as he was overseas, working in untold hardships, saving up for the family. My mom on the other hand did not have the opportunity to complete her standard secondary education. What she lacked in certificates, she excelled in her management and people skills. Her enthusiasm and ambition also made her competent in many other areas. I observed that my mom and dad, though not the most compatible/ romantic couple on Earth, made a good team. He provided the funds and she managed it carefully, while instilling in us the thought processes that money could not buy.

There's alot to learn from them, as we try to fill in the shoes they leave behind.

Pictures speak a 1002 words

I managed to impress my dad today with my very organised filing habits, which I have got from him! He seemed thrilled (Oh Shu, we know how badly you crave his attention and approval).

I had one of those rare moments with my dad, going through ancient family photographs, which my mom has very thoughtfully sent through him. Photos remain one of the best forms of memories, and I'm a sucker for those. The changes to people/ places are so drastic over the years, it's amazing to see the contrasts. Some people in the photos are no more, others have grown and changed; photos have the power to take people back in time to specific time-frames in life.

On other news, I was publicly shamed/ blamed in an email chain to several people. Just because one person gave the incorrect information and some one else didnt bother to hear both sides of the story. No apologies received or records set right, sadly. And the whole thing began with me taking the initiative to do something out of my way, in hopes of helping makes things better for many people at work! *sigh* Seriously, Shu, just mind your own business, serves you right for being too enthusiastic about rendering services.

Funny, just this morning I read of a woman who was jailed for 30 days for "trying to steal another passenger's watch from the x-ray scanner at the airport". She claims she noticed the passenger before her forget it in the tray and she was on her way to return it when she was stopped by authorities and arrested for stealing it! So the paper advised people to be cautious when helping strangers (not kidding).

Going with down a flu bug.... bring it on little bug!

Blood Ties

The snipping away of the umbilical cord and physical separation of the mother and the child does not necessarily mean the end of the association, rather signifies the beginning of a new association, which includes the father's physical presence. While it's not arguable that the mother plays an irreplacable, highly specialised role in the child's development, a father's role to provide, protect and mentor is not inferior. A family without a father-figure is not a complete one.

Parents continue to be one of your strongest strengths and motivators, long after we have passed our childhood years. More often than not, we forget that they exist, lying in the shadows, always thinking of us. It amuses me to see them continue to treasure us and protect us how ever older we get, for better or for worse. They eventually support us in whatever stand we take on. They are quick to forgive us for the blunders we make. They sometimes annoy us with their outdated cultural views and embarrass us by defying social etiquette. Yet, when things turn bad, we have a tendency to seek safe shelter under their wings.

Ours is a crazy family. We love each other very fiercely, but we all fail to express it openly. Instead, we like to show each other our love by our actions. We talk less and do more for each other.

Many things considered, mine's as perfect a family gets.